I know there are studies on worldview and names for different worldviews, but I’m not that deep or detailed, so let’s just call this Sarah’s worldview.

I grew up believing all kinds of things were sins that aren’t really sins. (Things like swearing and smoking and sex and skipping church. I can see how these could all be sins when used with a sinister spirit and a hardened heart. I can also see how these things can just be things, like taking your dog for a walk or mailing a letter or sleeping through your alarm. Sin is what’s in a man’s heart.)

I also grew up believing truths that aren’t really truths. (Like getting straight A’s and being “good” all the time were going to earn me eternal salvation.)

I grew up thinking everything was either black or it was white. You are either right or you’re wrong.

And like most disillusioned 20-somethings I went on a hunt to “find myself” and it took me a while——or rather, it’s taking me a while. You see, I’m a “good girl.” If you say something is bad for me, I probably won’t do it. If you tell me what I “should” and “shouldn’t” be doing I’ll try so very hard to make sure I’m doing what I “should” at all times.

I was so busy trying to do the “right” thing that I was hardly doing anything at all.

Please understand, I still think there are things I should and shouldn’t do. I still believe in obedience and righteousness and goodness. But I don’t believe in squashing people until the obey or act rightly or are really really good. All of those attributes come from the character of a person’s heart.

So what do I believe?

I believe in Jesus. I believe that He is the reason for living, for persevering, for sacrificing and for dying.

A friend of mine once said, “Everyone wastes their life on something. I’m wasting mine on Jesus.”

I like that.

I believe loving people is my true calling. And I try to do it everywhere I go.

I believe religion is a serious matter and can be skewed in so many direction so as not to reflect the character of Christ at all. This is a problem. I don’t have the solution.

I also believe some church groups are loving and generous and honest and full of spunk and reflect the character of Christ quite wonderfully. This makes my heart spill over with thankfulness and I hope to be more like these folks.

I believe in questions. When we tell people not to ask questions we become dictators. I ask a lot of questions. I hope other people ask questions too.

I believe in honesty. Real honesty. The kind that makes your gut hurt if you try to keep it in.

I believe a lot of other things too. I believe sometimes screaming helps.