hair and regret.

Sars-hairShe-who-will-remain-nameless: “Wow, your hair is … different.”
Me: “Yep! Like it?”
SWWRN: “Um, it’s … unique. It’s kind of the thing right now.”
Me: “Yep.” (I’m smiling because I know she is afraid to say she hates it.)
SWWRN: “What will you think about that haircut in thirty years? Don’t you think you’ll look back and think, ‘wow, 2014 was weird’ and kind of regret it?”

I’m not actually sure I responded to this. I might have feigned amusement and changed the subject. What I am sure of is that my brain was screaming because humans should learn to keep their criticisms of other humans to themselves. (And I am painfully aware that I can be a very judgy human. I’m working on that.)

But after I calmed down a bit, I realized SWWRN was right. I probably will regret this.

Here’s what I should have said to her:

Oh of course I will look back with embarrassment. I will look at photos and think, I was a wild child, always trying to be edgy. I’ll probably also look back at photos of me in my red jeans and wonder why anyone let me leave the house. I will crack up about the hoopty of a car I drove and the archaic iPhone that was all the rage when I was 28. How small and fast we thought it was back then.

I want to tell her that “YOU will also look back with embarrassment at silly clothing you wore or weird things you put on the internet.”

And I am almost positive we will all regret skinny jeans.

We’ll chuckle because phrases like YOLO stuck around wayyyy too long.

And yes, of course there will be haircuts we’ll be embarrassed by in thirty years.

But right now I think I look badass. And I finally look almost as edgy and alternative as I feel inside. Right now I want to sample a little bit from the entire world. And that includes partially shaved hairstyles and skinny jeans and tattoos and bad dates and nose rings and a million other things I might “regret” later.

Today I have no regrets.

And when I do, screaming helps.

Processed with VSCOcam with f2 presetImage Credit; TOP: Carey Rose BOTTOM: Katie Richardson


  1. says

    You are beautiful, friend. That first picture of you at the top is GORGEOUS.

    And I love this part “But right now I think I look badass. And I finally look almost as edgy and alternative as I feel inside.” AMEN to choosing to look how you feel, instead of choosing to look how people expect you to.

    • Sarah Joslyn says

      Bethany, come sit in my living room in my tiny house and say encouraging things to me all day long. I need nothing else in the world. Just you and your beautiful words. I love you.

  2. says

    Love this post! I’ve been cutting my own hair for years, and sometimes the results are unfortunate, but then it grows out, and I forget and have a go at it again with my own shears and my husband’s hair-clipper. One time I just ran the latter all over my head, because I was hot and sick of my hair getting in my face. Plus, I was kinda going for a 40-year-old badass look. I don’t think it looked too bad, really, but I did remember that I wished I’d left my bangs a little longer.
    Someday, maybe, I’ll pop into a Fantastic Sam’s or Great Clips, and just ask someone to sort of tidy up my latest mowing job a bit. But my 3-year-old makes that kind of impossible, unless my husband is able to watch him at home.
    Plus, part of the bad-ass factor is taking risks, and I have an idea of how to fix my latest hair issue ( you learn things from years of trial and error) on my own — for free! I might regret the results, but I’ve been known to regret getting my hair done by someone else, too.
    I like the streaks of gray in my short hair, though. And I like to make it sticky-uppy in places, just for fun.
    And I honestly think your hair looks great — edgy and also flattering — which is more than I can say for the results I’ve gotten sometimes. ;)

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