I went on my first real date last weekend.

Pathetic, eh? 25 years old and this was the first time anyone had bothered to ask me out on a date. This was my first date that wasn’t just, Oh hey, we should hang out sometime and it will conveniently be just the two of us but I’ll still let you pay for your food because we’re just kicking it as friends and all.

Anyway, I learned 3 things on this first date of mine.

1. For as long as I can remember I have thought that my snaggle-tooth, love-handles, English nose and ability to out-talk a Magpie were the reasons I was still single. Despite my wealth of friends telling me otherwise, these thoughts have persisted. Until Saturday. I apologized for talking too much and my date scolded me. “You can’t say you talk too much. What is too much? You just are who you are and no apologies are necessary.” Somewhere in the recesses of my mind I knew these things to be true, but for the first time it actually felt true. I just am and no apologies are necessary.

2. Humans have an innate desire for companionship and relationship. We’re made for it. And it’s beautiful. But what if we used this desire to pursue God? What if we pursued companionship, relationship, even romance with the creator of the UNIVERSE? We spend so much of our singleness trying to find someone. But that is the unique time of our lives where we can pursue God with all our hearts without risk of neglecting a companion. I don’t want to waste this place in my life. Starting now.

3. I’m not ready. I’m 25 and I’m not ready. Who gets to have what I have? Who gets to drop everything (because I don’t have anything) and travel? Who gets to take a 12-day road trip without having an agenda or a need to check in? Who gets to live in a drafty, unfinished upstairs apartment for cheap (and no lease) and save all their money for a ticket to Kenya? I don’t have a significant other or pets or kids. The only thing to neglect is my aloe plant and those suckers are resilient. Nope, not ready. Singleness is bliss.

Mmhhhmmm. Sometimes screaming helps.